Friday, December 4, 2009

Telling Jackson

Our plan was to wait to tell the boys until we saw a heartbeat. However, I've had a lot of doctor visits and lab tests lately, and I could tell Jackson was beginning to worry. On Sunday, December 6, I was getting ready for church, and the morning sickness hit harder than it had so far. Jackson was right there, trying to comfort me and holding a puke bowl. (FYI: The toilet in a house full of boys is not a good place to vomit...no matter how often you clean it! If I wasn't heaving by the time I got there, I for sure would if I had to hang over it!) He was telling me I needed to stay home from church and that he would stay with me. He was so concerned and would not leave my side.




I knew this sickness was only going to get worse before it gets better. Jackson is too aware...I told Michael I thought we should tell him because he was going to be so worried about me, especially when Michael is away on business. So, we pulled him into the bathroom away from his brothers. I told him that we would not be adopting after all. He literally deflated before our eyes. Then, I explained that we were having another baby. He re-inflated!




His excitement was overwhelming and tears began to fill his eyes. He was blinking fast and hard to try to keep from crying. I told him that it's okay to cry when we are happy, and his tears flowed. It was a most precious moment with our precious firstborn. He is so sensitive and loving. We told him he needs to keep it quiet for awhile because the baby is very tiny, and we want to make sure it's healthy before telling his brothers and others. He said, " I won't tell them about the B A B Y!" He spells it all the time now...like he's the only one besides us who can spell! (He even prayed before dinner one night, "Lord, we are believing in our heart that our B A B Y is healthy." The brothers didn't catch on. Keaton still talks about our baby girl we are going to adopt, and Jackson seems torn between wanting to set him straight and keeping our secret. I will be glad when we see a strong heartbeat and healthy pregnancy so we can tell Keaton together.)




Jackson was so excited that he found out on a Sunday. He asked if he could tell his friends at church. I told him not yet, but he apologized as soon as we picked him up after class saying, "I'm sorry, Mom. I was about to explode! My cheeks were even getting red. Don't worry though. I told an adult. She can keep a secret!" Later, he admitted it was actually two adults. :)




He also handed me his work from Sunday School. They were given a coloring sheet of a gift. They were to give someone a gift of one of the Fruits of the Spirit. His sheet read, "To: My new baby - From: Jackson - I give you the gift of JOIY!!" He gave his new baby the gift of JOY. How sweet is that?!?!? (I have friends pulling for "Jemma Joi" if it's a girl. "Jemma" is my girl name that has been on stand-by for almost 10 years!)




A few years ago, Jackson was very upset when we told him that Landon was a boy. He was crying his eyes out because we were told Landon was a girl for a couple of months, then we had to tell Jackson it was actually a boy. He cried, "I already have a brother!!!" While we were talking a few days ago, he said, "Mom, I hope it's a girl." I told him that we have to be content with whatever God gives us. He said, "I know, but I am going to imagine it's a girl, okay?" I again told him that if we end up with another boy, that we know without a doubt that it's God's will for our family...a house full of boys! He agreed.




I received my progesterone and hcg levels a few days ago. The hcg is moving up nicely, even more than tripled between Wednesday and Friday. Then, my progesterone was surprisingly good for me...34-37. It was half that with Landon and borderline low with Keaton, both of which required supplements. I am even more anxious now to see that sono! If we see more than one in there, you will hear the scream for miles and miles!!!




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